We’ve all heard the saying, “Dress for the job you want, not the job you have” and it makes sense in the corporate world. If you want to become CEO one day, you can’t show up in a t-shirt and jeans. (There are exceptions, of course) I believe this concept also makes sense in the dating world.
So many gals decide to dress…extremely inappropriately (this is me being polite) and then ask me or wonder why men don’t take them seriously. Well, just like someone who is looking to hire a new employee would expect the applicant to show up dressed appropriately for the interview men, who are looking to date you and not just have a one night stand with you, also look for a woman they can bring home to mom. If that woman is wearing basically nothing, guess what? The guy probably is very attracted to her, but isn’t taking her too seriously. Now, this does not mean you need to change who you are, your personal style or try to look like a housewife from the 1950’s, we want women to feel empowered and you don’t have to dress proactively to feel empowered! This does mean that the skirt you own that you can’t sit down in because you will basically be showing your birthday suit may need to get tossed out or donated.
Millions of women are celebrated for being sexy! And those women have mastered looking sexy and elegant at the same time. It’s a great feeling to stop traffic when you are looking amazing! It’s an even better feeling to know that both men and women are admiring you, not gawking at you because you have left too little to the imagination. Did I mention that men typically like a little mystery? They see so many nearly naked girls online everyday, sometimes clothes are actually refreshing. Plus, it leaves them to wonder how you actually look naked… the build up is half the fun!
You can communicate your feminine energy by dressing with sophistication and grace, this will help you attract men who are on the same wavelength. Sometimes when women dress too scandalously, they give off the wrong vibe and end up attracting men who only care about getting into their pants. This can leave women feeling unfulfilled knowing that the man never had any intention of actually getting to know her.
Your clothes don’t define you, but they are a representation of what you want the world to see. Women who are confident about themselves and have self-love will respect themselves and portray it. Naturally, the men they attract will also love themselves and eventually fall for a woman for who she is, not just for her body. Any woman can attract a man with sex appeal, but not every woman is brave enough to put her true self out there, not just her skin.
On a personal note, my fiance teases me and says I dress like a nun. (No offense to the nuns!) He’s obviously exaggerating, but he says he was so used to women showing so much skin that he was intrigued by me because I never have. He’s always said he is proud of the fact that I am confident enough not to dress like a lot of girls and how I’m able to shine and look beautiful without attracting the wrong type of attention. Unfortunately, so many women show so much skin because they have low self-esteem and are trying to get attention anyway they can. It’s harder to be different and a bit more conservative, but in the end it pays off. Elegance and sophistication never goes out of style.
If you don’t believe me, just ask Carolina Herrera: Huffington Post , Vanity Fair(Spanish)
Some quick tips for dressing sexy not smutty (yes, smutty):
- If you are showing a lot of leg, keep it conservative on the top
- If you are showing a lot of cleavage, keep it conservative on the bottom
- If you have an open back, cover up the front
- If you feel uncomfortable, it’s probably best to change
- If you would avoid your friend’s parents, your own parents or someone you admire, change clothes
- If your clothes are so tight you can’t breathe or other body parts start coming out, buy a larger size or get a new outfit
- If people think you are going to a costume party and ask if you are Julia Roberts from “Pretty Woman”… change
- If you have the words “Nip Slip” on the brain and you are concerned…change
- If fashion tape has an equal/similar ratio to the fabric of your dress… change
- If you are really confused, send us a picture!